Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Two Unrelated Things

A lot of different blog topics are rolling around in my head tonight, but I will stick with two short and easy ones:

1. I believe that Pumpkin has a new favorite book, Max's First Word, by Rosemary Wells. She still likes Bunny and Me, by Adele Aron Greenspun and Joannie Schwarz, but it is no longer the book she reaches for when presented with a choice. For the longest time, she would reach for Bunny and Me. We never really knew why she loved it. It doesn't have particularly bright colors, but it is visually arresting (at least to an adult, it is impossible to know what Pumpkin really thought of it). It is a cute little story: the "friendship" between a baby and a bunny is introduced, then the bunny hops away. The baby searches for the bunny, and eventually finds the bunny hiding in a basket. Pumpkin likes to pause on the page where the baby reacts to the bunny hopping away. The picture is of a crying baby. She reaches out and touches the baby's face with one of her little fingers for awhile, then she turns the page. Now she is reaching for Max's First Word, but I suspect this will be a short-lived favorite. Already, it has tough competition from Raffi's Baby Beluga. She likes to touch the pictures of the animals in that one.

Anyway, I've updated the "What Pumpkin's Reading" section on the right appropriately.

2. It occurred to me yesterday that Hubby will spend days, sometimes even weeks, researching the purchase of a laptop or other electronic toy. However, if I didn't bring a bunch of baby books into the house, I don't think he'd feel the need to research anything about parenting. Well, he might run a Google search if she did something really unexpected, like break out in purple spots or something.

I, on the other hand, tend to purchase things with little research, but have been known to research parenting decisions to the point of obsession. I am still recovering from my attempt to decide how to introduce solids to Pumpkin based on research. (Start with rice cereal. No! That is too bland and boring. Start with sweet potato! Or avocado! Introduce meat last. No! First! No! Never! Babies must only eat puree until they have teeth. No! Babies should eat finger foods as soon as they can grasp them. No! Let the baby decide what she wants to eat!)

I don't mean to judge Hubby, because, frankly, his parenting instincts are pretty good. And he is certainly the less worried of Pumpkin's two parents. However, if I didn't do research, I would never have found Ask Moxie and all the wonderful advice and comfort that site brings to me. I think there is probably a happy medium between our two approaches. I wonder if we'll eventually reach it?

8 comments:

  1. Cloud, you have just described my hubby!! Will spend hours researching important 'electronic' purchases but just goes with the flow re parenting. I, OTOH, have become almost obsessive re all things parenting. SLEEP mostly, but yes introducing solids as well, since my health visitor told me to start her on them (she's 5 months next week). Of course, all the Grandparents jumped on this as the key to solving all my sleep probs (depsite it being counter intuitive). She doesn't wake form hunger all night - she wakes and can't put herself back to sleep. SOLIDS WILL NOT HELP. Yeesh!

    My instincts say don't start now, she really doesn't need them, but I can't help but feel like it's my crap parenting that has coursed her to be a bad sleeper (I know, I know, nonsense - probably) and that I should just take their advice.

    Reading too much can really screw with your instincts - but still I google...

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  2. Sam, we started Pumpkin on solids at 5 months because she was really, really curious about food and because I had a business trip at 6 months and was hoping to get some calories coming from a non-me source. It didn't do a thing to her sleep, good or bad. (Incidentally, it also didn't decrease her milk intake.)

    I have also struggled with the idea that her sleep issues must be my fault, but really, in my more rational moments, I think this is not true. Different people sleep differently. Hubby falls asleep almost as soon as his head hits the table. It takes me ~30 minutes, even when I'm really tired. Why should babies be any different? I think Pumpkin just has a hard time "shutting down" for sleep, much like her mommy does. Sleep deprivation sucks enough without the guilt. I'm trying to let it go and just focus on what we can do to help our family get more sleep.

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  3. And this is why I love Ask Moxie. She is my first and foremost source of parenting advice mainly because she (or her commenters) presents all sides of an issue, tells you to do what feels right for you and your baby, and makes you realize that things like sleep are not your fault.

    I thought my hubby wasn't researching parenting issues. But it turns out, he really was. He just didn't tell me the details and obsess in the way that I do. But when I bring something up to him, for example when I started to look into baby-led weaning/feeding (how we started the Pumpkin on solids), he really did research on his own. I also sent him links to the articles I was reading, which he did read. I definitely do more research and obsessing, but when he is not sure about something, he will really look into it.

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  4. Number 2 .. very interesting. I'm totally addicted to parenting books. But I do let others things slide -- I figure, there's a human being at stake in the first case, so that's pretty important!

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  5. Mimi, I'm with you. I figure these parenting decisions are the most important ones we'll make. He figures that its "mostly obvious". As I said, his instincts seem good and Pumpkin definitely thinks he's the best thing ever. Maybe he should write a parenting book?

    Seriously, I think together we have a good balance.

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  6. The trouble with parenting books is that my baby didn't read them. She didn't do any of the things she was supposed to do when she was supposed to do them. Nothing about motherhood happened according to plan (starting with the 5 months of bedrest).

    Child of Mine: Feeding with Love and Good Sense by Ellyn Satter came highly recommended. It was okay, but the recipes are too bland for my taste. Satter has a bias against soy-based foods, which I attribute to lack of exposure to tasty Asian soy foods. To this day, plain tofu without sauce is one of my daughter's favorite foods.

    I posted about how we fed her in http://badmomgoodmom.blogspot.com/2006/08/baby-food-for-competitive-set.html

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  7. The link should have been http://badmomgoodmom.blogspot.com/2006/08/baby-food-for-competitive-set.html

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  8. I don't know why blogger is cutting off the URL Grace posted. The last bit is: baby-food-for-competitive-set.html

    I have tried the home pureed food thing, and agree that it is not too hard. We also used to mash up bananas. Lately, though, all Pumpkin wants is crackers and maybe some fruit. To get her to eat veggies, I have to alternate with fruit (2 bites fruit, 1 bite veggie...) We've tried other finger foods (steamed baby carrots, pasta, etc) with no real luck. Just tonight I decided to try adding some spice to the pureed sweet potatoes I was defrosting for her. I put some ginger in. It seemed to help.

    I was an extremely picky eater as a child, so my family just laughs and says that at least she come by this naturally. She's growing fine, so I'm trying not to worry about this.

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