Sunday, March 29, 2009

My Life Flashing Before My Eyes...

... or at least the photos of my life since 2002.

My old laptop has been getting pretty creaky, so I finally decided to upgrade. I use a Mac at home (we also have a dual-boot PC that's usually running Windows and a dual-boot server that's usually running Linux- we're a multi-platform family).

My old Mac is so old that the data migration tool Apple provides doesn't run on it. Therefore, I'm moving my files by hand. My photos are in an old version of iPhoto, and have to be imported into the new version once I've transferred them. While its importing the photos, iPhoto flashes them on the screen.

I've gotten a bit nostalgic, watching the memories flash past. Most of the photos we take now are of Pumpkin. Before she came along, most of our photos were from trips or hikes we took around San Diego. Hubby and I had some good trips, and seeing the photos makes me smile. But it also makes me sad for all the places we didn't get to. Obviously, we're not done traveling, but it will be a while before we do any big international trips. So I smile at the photos from Bath and Wales, and wonder when we'll make it to Scotland. I watch the photos from Rome flash past, and wonder when we'll make it to Venice, or Florence.

I haven't even gotten to the "big trip" photos.... I'm watching the photos from our wedding and honeymoon in the Cook Islands flash past now. I've already started a campaign to go back there for our 5th wedding anniversary. Of course, that is next year, and we'll have a 7 month old then, so maybe I should campaign to go back for our 10th anniversary. Either way, Hubby would rather go see someplace new, like Vanuatu.

I know that we'll be traveling again before I know it. Time flies, etc., etc. It will be wonderful to travel with children, and see the sights through their unjaded eyes. We've already had a taste of that with our trip to Seattle. But there will also be a lot of stops we make that we'd never have considered before we had kids. For instance, I recently read about Fairytaleland in Sacramento and thought, "gee, that sounds like a good place to go." And it will be many, many years before we waste an afternoon in an Irish pub just because there is a booth that used to be a confessional. (I think the pub was called "The Bank", and its in the San Francisco banking district. They poured a nice pint of Guinness, too.) I think the trade off is a good one. But it is still a trade off.

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Somethings I Want to Remember

I'm still waiting for that magic second trimester energy burst to arrive... or at least to stop feeling sick in the evenings. Until that happens, posting may be less frequent, which I'm sure frustrates me more than any of my readers. There are so many things I want to post about!

I've decided that the most important things to write about right now are the things Pumpkin does or says that I might otherwise forget. So here are a few:

1. She's started saying "I wuv you". She first said it, totally unprompted, to Hubby last Thursday as we were getting her ready for day care. Hubby thought it was pretty funny that he got an "I wuv you" and I didn't. One of his little quirks is his reticence to say "I love you" to me unprompted. He says that he shouldn't need to tell me he loves me- it is obvious. He decided that Pumpkin must have come to the same conclusion.

Luckily for family harmony, Pumpkin started saying "I wuv you, Mommy" this weekend, and now I get more "I wuv yous" than Daddy does, probably because I respond more enthusiastically.

Pumpkin also gives great hugs and big sloppy kisses, but hearing "I wuv you" is even better.

2. Since becoming pregnant, I have spent a lot of time on the sofa, resting. Pumpkin has taken this pretty well, although she does sometimes tug on my arm and demand that I get "down an' play!" (This is a pretty hard request to resist.) Sometimes, she announces "I rest" or "I rest wif Mommy", and climbs up on the opposite end of the sofa. She pulls the blanket up to her chin and gives me a big grin. This doesn't last long before she starts playing peek a boo with the blanket. She particularly likes it if we both hide under the blanket at once. This isn't really what I mean by "resting", but it is awfully cute.

3. I think Pumpkin has made her first joke. We were watching Baby Signing Time and the sign for "share" came on. She got one of her best impish grins on her face and announced "Mine!"

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

An End and a Beginning

So... Pumpkin is weaned. She last nursed Saturday, March 7, before going to sleep. She next asked to nurse on the following Monday, also during the bedtime routine. She said "boppy?" I took a deep breath, snuggled her closer, and said "no, honey, lets just snuggle." And unbelievably, she did. She's asked once more, and I said the same thing, and she didn't complain.

I've written quite a bit about my ambivalence toward weaning. That remains. I am so glad that Pumpkin and I had such a long and good nursing relationship. I'm glad that it ended with so little fuss (at least from her- some might argue that all my posting and talking about it is a lot of fuss indeed). Recently, someone wrote an article in the Atlantic about what a hassle breastfeeding is, and parts of it made me spitting mad. I would like to come back and write up my feelings about that at some point. For now, One Tired Ema does a good job of explaining some of my objections. I do not have anything against formula, and certainly wouldn't presume to judge mothers who decide to use it. But I have to say, breastfeeding Pumpkin was one of my favorite things, and I am glad I persisted through the (really common) early difficulties and got to do it.

And for the record, I had no significant problems pumping at work, no one ever so much as looked at me cross-eyed for doing it, and I find the idea that it has somehow hindered my career progress laughable. (Of course, I am very lucky in the type of job I have, which made it possible to work while pumping, and the enlightened state in which I live, which mandates lactation rooms and lactation breaks.)

deep cleansing breaths

So if I loved nursing so much and found it to be so wonderful, why did I wean? Because I'm pregnant. That's right- I'm just about 12 weeks pregnant now. Nursing was becoming less comfortable, and I wanted to wean Pumpkin before there was any chance that she'd associate the event with my pregnancy. Now that's done- on to the transition to the big girl bed!


I think most people I know in real life who read this blog already know my news. If you don't- I'm sorry that you're reading it here instead of hearing it from me. What can I say? I've been tired lately. Which also explains why I'm posting about once a week, if I'm lucky.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Common Threads

I recently stumbled across the A Little Pregnant blog, which should be required reading for any politician thinking about tackling issues related to infertility and assisted reproduction.

This blog got me thinking, because it is a little window into a world I will never personally know. I hope that I have come away from my read through her archives a little more sensitive to the things that cause people who do have personal experience with infertility unnecessary pain.

One of my favorite things about reading "mommyblogs" is that they give me a chance to learn a little bit about communities I am unlikely to get much firsthand knowledge of in real life. For instance, I like to check in on One Tired Ema from time to time. I check in mostly because she's funny, and tells good stories. But I've also learned just a little bit about what life is like for an Orthodox Jewish stay at home mom with relatives in Israel. This is something my offline life is not likely to provide me with many opportunities to learn. I probably do know people who share many of the opinions and experiences Lindsay writes about at Suburban Turmoil, but we're unlikely to have the sort of open and frank discussion of religion she hosted the other day because it would probably make us both uncomfortable.

I have very little in common with the women who write some of the blogs I check in on regularly, but what I have in common with them is completely fundamental. We all love our children, and want what's best for them.

The "mommyblog" scene is not all sweetness and light. There are ugly, judgmental debates about whether you should or shouldn't let your baby cry it out, whether everyone is trying hard enough to breastfeed, or if people are making mothers who can't/don't breastfeed feel unnecessarily bad, etc. If pushed, I'd probably have some opinions on most topics, but if parenting has taught me anything it is some humility and respect for the limits of my opinions. I try to just appreciate the little windows into other types of lives, and remember that my opinion really only applies to what is best for my baby.

Despite the flaws of the momosphere, I have to think that there are other people like me out there, following the common thread of parenthood and reading blogs that are exposing them to different communities, enjoying the stories and learning a little bit about life in someone else's shoes. And that must be a good thing.

Sunday, March 08, 2009

Happy Birthday, You

I haven't had the energy lately to write proper posts, and apparently, I don't even have the energy to pick a zenbit and post that.

I do have the energy to share Pumpkin's latest super cute thing, though:

It is Hubby's birthday tomorrow. My sister came over last night to make us dinner to celebrate. We told Pumpkin that it was Daddy's birthday party. She seemed a little disappointed that this birthday party, unlike the ones at day care, didn't have cupcakes. But she was still happy to sing her rendition of "Happy Birthday" to Hubby. It went like this:

"Happy birthday you you, Daddy!"

Tuesday, March 03, 2009


The Marines have said that the jet crash that killed four members of one family, including a toddler and a newborn, would not have happened if everyone had followed the correct emergency procedures.

I am impressed at their honesty, but a little flabbergasted at the statement. If there is one thing I tend to expect the military to be good at, it is following procedures.

And I'm thinking again about risk, and risk mitigation. At work, we've been trying to agree upon new safety procedures for a new project that we're starting, which uses chemicals that are potent cytotoxins (literally, cell killers) but that do not fall under one of the regulatory regimes that make figuring out safety procedures much easier. We'll be working with small amounts, and I'm fairly comfortable with how the procedures are turning out. But I feel a little more justified in my arguments that you have to plan for the failure of procedures.