Thought Experiments

Nicoleandmaggie had a post this week about how silly the advice to live every day like it was your last is. I agree- I don't find that particularly useful advice, even for provoking thought.

As I mentioned in their comments, though, there are some "thought experiment" type questions that I do find useful, albeit more as sources of information about my true preferences than as guides to how I should actually live my life.

One such question is the popular "would you keep doing your job if you didn't need the money?" There have been times in my career when I would have answered "yes" to that, but now is not one of those times. This is interesting information, but it doesn't mean that I should quit my job, or even that I should try to find a new job. Right now, the work that I think I'd be doing if I didn't need money is researching and writing non-fiction books that examine interesting questions using a variety of approaches- similar to what Michael Pollan does in The Botany of Desire, but probably quirkier and far less commercially viable.

So yeah, I'm not going to toss my current career overboard for that. But maybe I could think about why the idea of writing that sort of book appeals to me, and see what that tells me about how I should be spending my life.

I recently came across another useful thought experiment question in Sheryl Sandberg's Lean In (Yes, I will probably write a post about my reaction to this book and my reaction to some of the other reactions to it... but not until I finish the book. Spoiler alert: I'm really liking the book so far.)

A fear I won't be conquering

The question is from one of those hokey motivational-type posters, which are apparently plastered on the walls at Facebook- which, given the fact that people apparently like posting hokey motivational quotes on their Facebook walls is probably cosmically appropriate. It is: "what would you do if you weren't afraid?" One of the passages I've highlighted in the book is Sandberg's own answer to this:

"Writing this book is not just me encouraging others to lean in. This is me leaning in. Writing this book is what I would do if I weren't afraid."

While I was out for my lunchtime walk yesterday, I realized that I know the answer to that question I want to be a "maker" even if that means exposing myself to the nastiness of the "haters" in this world. My answer to that hokey Facebook question showed me that I still have some fears holding me back. Having that information is quite powerful. Now I just have to decide what to do with it.
for me right now, and that was very, very interesting. I am not ready to blog about it, because I haven't decided if I'll act on it. After all, sometimes our fears are quite rational and deserve to be respected. In some ways, I have already started to stare down some of my fears, in that I've decided

Do you have any favorite thought experiment questions? Share them in the comments.

Good Weekends, Present and Future

Our last few weekends have been a bit hectic- too many commitments, and not enough time to relax. This weekend was a better balance- we had an evening playdate/dinner with one of Petunia's classmates Saturday night, but were otherwise unscheduled at the start of the weekend. We got enough of our chores done on Saturday that we decided we could have a Family Fun Day today, as long as we picked one of the things that wouldn't actually take an entire day. So we decided to go on a surrey bike ride in Coronado.

We got a late start because we all slept in a bit- which is still rare enough to shock me when it happens. It was 11:30 a.m. by the time we set out from the rental place by the Hotel del Coronado. They were out of single surreys, so we opted for a side-by-side recumbent Deuce Coupe instead, which was also fun. I wanted to see Silver Strand, so we headed south. This was a bit of a mistake, because for most of the ride we couldn't see much water at all, but we did get a great view of the Coronado Bridge at the start.

A nice start

We rode for about an hour, then had lunch at the Coronado Brewing Company and a quick play at a nearby park, and then drove home.

Later in the afternoon, the girls decided they wanted to do some art, so I set them up on their little plastic table outside and spent about an hour thinking I would get to sit and enjoy my drink, but getting up every couple of minutes to help someone squirt paint from a tube instead. But the girls had fun.

Artist #1

Artist #2

And they produced quite a few paintings.

Future fridge decorations

The single color ones are largely Pumpkin's. She called them her portraits, and specifically chose to do one in each color.

I also spent about an hour researching Disneyland and Disney's California Adventure. We've decided to take our first trip to Disneyland with the kids, in honor of Pumpkin's 6th birthday. I found it too stressful to figure out how to handle a birthday party this year- we have friends from day care, kindergarten, and before/after care. We have no desire to orchestrate a party for that many kids, no real idea for how to prune the guest list without causing offense, and no idea how to deliver invites to the kids at school. Mr. Snarky laughed at me for worrying about those things, but quickly came around to my way of thinking when I said that he could be in charge of figuring it out. So we are buying our way out of the dilemma and going to Disneyland. Pumpkin is incredibly excited.

This is not a cheap solution at all, and we have no intention of returning before Petunia's 6th birthday presents the same set of problems, and then probably not for another 5 years- I just can't see how it can possibly be worth this much money to go more often. Therefore, I'm determined to make the most of this visit. Pumpkin's birthday falls during spring break, so we can actually be at the park on her birthday, which I hear is a fun thing. We've bought two day park hopper tickets for Friday and Saturday. We'll drive up Thursday evening, and drive home Sunday morning.

So now all I need to do is figure out how to arrange our two days of Disney fun. We aren't going to try to see everything- which is helped by the fact that I don't really like roller coasters (I get motion sick) and Mr. Snarky went with a friend from New Zealand not long before Pumpkin came along, so he's had his chance to do the bigger rides. Therefore, we're focusing only on things for the kids, except perhaps a visit to the Muppet attraction for Mr. Snarky.

However, even with that focus, there are a lot of options, and a lot of ground to cover. Given my planning tendencies, I can't help but try to plan it out. I want to have a loose plan, with enough slack for improvisation. Here is what I have so far:

Day 1 - Start in CA Adventure, end at Disneyland

Morning: Ride Red Trolley, Car’s Land, Paradise Pier

Lunch: Ariel’s Grotto

Afternoon: A Bug’s Land, over to Disneyland for the Disneyland Railroad

Dinner: Somewhere in Disneyland?

Evening: Disneyland Parade

Day 2 - Disneyland

Morning: Main Street USA, Fantasyland

Lunch: Daisy’s Diner in Toontown

Afternoon: Critter Country

Dinner: Downtown Disney (Rainforest Cafe)?

Evening: Swim at the hotel? Stay for Parade again? Go see the World of Color?

Are there any Disney-philes out there? What do you think? Am I missing something that a 3.5 year old and a thrill-adverse 6 year old would really enjoy? I have heard that it is nice to start to with Main Street in Disneyland, but I want to do the Ariel's Grotto Princessapalooza on Pumpkin's actual birthday, which is the first day. Am I making a mistake by not having Main Street be their first taste of Disney?

Any and all advice gratefully accepted!

Weekend Reading: The Interesting Things Edition

It has been a bit of a "don't read the comments" sort of week on the big stories, and I don't have the energy to rehash the various angry-making stories tonight, despite the fact that I read many excellent things about Steubenville, PyCon, and that unfortunate New York magazine article abotu "retro wives." (There, you can Google anything you managed to miss, if you are so inclined.) 

I don't even have the energy to thoughtfully discuss the not-angry making but thought-provoking posts I came across this week. It has been a long week, after a busy weekend, after an even longer week. I'm tired and looking forward to a weekend that promises to be more relaxing.

So let's just focus on some fun and/or interesting things, shall we?

Gates McFadden (Dr. Crusher on Star Trek The Next Generation) has a tumblr in which she poses a Dr. Crusher action figure in various vignettes. Quite diverting.

You probably saw this article about the Russian family that was cut off from civilization for 40 years ages ago, but if you missed it, go read it now. It is fascinating.

And here is a more recent interesting article arguing that beer helped to give us civilization.

The Bean Chronicles found a great quote on writing, which I hope means that she is planning to write more blog posts soon!

Jane Yolen does a great job with a Big Idea post over at Scalzi's blog. I remember reading some of her books when I was a "young adult." I am now looking forward to rediscovering them with my kids!

I hope you have a relaxing weekend ahead of you, too. Feel free to leave me further happy, distracting things in the comments!

Show Us Your Bookcases!

Apparently there is a meme or meme-like thing going on in the academic blogging world around taking a picture of your bookcase(s) and posting it on your blog. I saw it at Nicoleandmaggie's blog, and was persuaded to join in. (OK, I admit it, it took one question and I agreed to do it... It sounded like fun!)

There are two main bookcases for the grown ups in my house. Each child also has a bookcase in her room, and there is a shelf of kids' books in the living room, too. I have had to prune back books rather aggresively since having kids. We just don't have enough space for everything. I have also started buying my books almost exclusively in electronic format. I have discovered that I actually prefer reading on the Kindle. It is easier to carry with me. It is light enough to hold in one hand, no matter how long the book is. And I can make highlights guilt free (I'm the daughter of a librarian, and have a very hard time writing in a book!) and easily find those highlights later. As a bonus, I also don't have to figure out how to store the physical book.

Here is the bookcase in the living room.

The bottom four shelves are fiction. Those are a mix of mine and Mr. Snarky's, but since Mr. Snarky had to ship his possessions over in a shipping container when he moved here, my books far outnumber his.  The top shelf holds my philosophy books from college- yes, I've read at least a portion of each of those, plus some more that were in a box that was lost in transit between college and graduate school. I took Philosophical Perspectives for my humanities sequence and Classics of Social and Political Thought for my social sciences sequence. I then decided I wanted some different reading and switched to Near Eastern Civilizations for my history sequence, which means I've read large portions of the Koran and the Bible as well as Zoroastrian texts (stored elsewhere, next to my copy of the The Tao of Pooh). And yet I remain areligious...

Anyway, back to the bookcase. The second shelf from the top is biographies and memoirs. I have a weakness for memoirs.

There are two more shelves that you can't see in this picture, because they are covered by the sofa- we needed more floor space for train tracks, so we shoved the sofa back at some point and decided to leave it there. Those store our travel guidebooks and infrequently used cookbooks.

And here are my bookshelves in the office:

The books on the shelves are my non-fiction that isn't a memoir or biography- although I see I have chosen to store The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks here for some reason. (If you haven't read that one, you should. It is every bit as good as you've heard.) The books on the very top shelf are my journals from our big "circle Pacific" trip, which I am so very glad I wrote. I occasionally get one down and reread a section, and I love how that brings back the good memories from that trip.

The stack by the printer is my physical "to read" stack, consisting mostly of gifts and things Mr. Snarky bought and thinks I should read. Actually, he tries to put every book he reads there, but I periodically give him a stack of rejects and tell him to figure out what to do with them himself- I don't want them.

In other book-related news, The Zebra Said Shhh now has FOUR five-star reviews (and one three-star review) on Amazon. I'm pretty happy about that, and very happy that people seem to be liking my book. And I'll leave it there before I start a Sally Field-esque gush.

Leave me comments about your bookcases- or links to your own pictures!

Weeding as a Metaphor for Life

Awhile back, I saw a post or a tweet or something in which someone asked: what chore do you actually like doing? (Notice my stellar memory at work there- I can't remember any of the details!)

At the time, I thought: are you crazy? Chores are things I don't like doing! Isn't that the definition of a chore?

But this weekend, I was outside weeding in our front yard and I realized that actually, weeding is a chore I like doing. We have our front yard landscaped with native plants, which makes the yard low water use- or really, no water use. We don't water our front yard anymore. The yard is also relatively low maintenance, but in the winter and spring time, particularly after it rains, we get weeds.

The thing is, when I go out to pull weeds, it is on one of the nice days after the rain. So I get to sit in the sun (or occasionally, the pseudo-sun of one of our cloudy days) and enjoy the outdoors. If I'm lucky, Mr. Snarky keeps the kids occupied, or they want to color with chalk on the driveway, and I can let my mind wander while I systematically pull up weeds. There is obvious progress. I get fresh air. I might even get peace and quiet. What's not to like?

I've written before how I find weeding to be an apt metaphor for life. I continue to find lessons in weeding. Here are my latest:

Something can be really pretty. If it is growing where you don't want it, it is still a weed.

Pretty. But still a weed.

You don't have to completely conquer a problem. Sometimes, it is enough to just make it better.

It is best to wait until the rain stops and the ground dries a bit before you try to pull weeds, or you'll bring up a lot more of the soil that you really want.

The big things are sometimes easier to fix than the little ones.

Easy.

Hard.

Do you have any life lessons from chores?