Last night, Petunia's bedtime went so poorly that I literally had to come out and get Hubby to take over before I lost it. She just would not go to sleep.
Tonight, she was asleep 10 minutes after lights out.
The difference? I think she was tired tonight, and ready to sleep. She hadn't taken a long afternoon nap, and I turned lights out 15 minutes later than I did last night.
There is a lesson in there for me, but I'm not sure I'll be smart enough to learn it. Petunia is not a baby who follows a schedule. We need to loosen up the routine a bit and follow her cues a bit more. I can't seem to get that through my head, probably because loosening up the routine was always a disaster when Pumpkin was a baby.
Speaking of Pumpkin, she went the entire day without any accidents. She is so proud of herself when she does that. So why doesn't she do it more often? Why does she fight us when we suggest she go to the potty? I have no insights there. So I'm just going to be happy that there are no peed on clothes soaking in my sink right now.
Do you ever find that sometimes you agonize and obsess over what the magic thing was that made one night good and another bad? Like there's some miracle thing like blue jammies versus pink that makes ALL the difference? Bah.
ReplyDeleteI think you've got good mommy instincts and that you're probably right about Petunia - some kids you follow the cues, others you have to set rigorous schedules.
I got nothing for you on Pumpkin and her accidents. By nothing that I did I'm sure, Rosie rarely has accidents. I'm not rubbing it in. I'm just sympathetic.
The latest thing soaking in my sink day after day is sheets, pillowcases, stuffed animals, and jammies stained with blood. Rosie's been having nose bleeds at night, and I think its because she won't keep her pickin' little finger out of there. Gross.
Melba's right. I never thought about it, but I had to keep Gus on a schedule both for me and because he was so hyped up he never would have slept ever if we didn't force it on him (so painful for us. hours of rocking...)
ReplyDeleteBut #2 maybe because she was number two and I cared less, but also because she was so easy. Had a schedule sort of. If she didn't follow it, oh well.
The good thing is EVENTUALLY, they do sleep, they do fall asleep and they do use the toilet some day!
Soldier on, momma!
Glad you found out that you need to loosen up the routine a bit and follow Petunia's cues a bit more. Kids are weird huh?
ReplyDeleteI've got nothing on the potty front. We have our own unique troubles: DS is completely day trained so long as he is naked from the waist down. The minute any clothing or a pull-up is on him, he wets. So that means anytime we've been at home or in a private residence or hotel, he has been running around half naked since oh, late July. ;) We figure it will click someday, and I'm just glad it isn't a power struggle yet, and that I didn't take some assvice I got to start giving him candy as a reward (they clearly don't know my determined boy and his memory - we never would have been able to quit with the candy had we ever started!)
A friend of mine with a 37 month old girl just found out that her supposed pee accidents were the result of vaginal voiding - where some of the urine flows into the vagina and seeps out later making her mom think she "had an accident." Interesting stuff you hear about once you become a mom! It's a trip.
Tired and ready to sleep makes all the difference around here too but I've never found a magic formula for getting him to that point at just the right time. Weekends are a lot easier for that than week nights. More sleep and less pee clothing is definitely a good day. Props to Petunia and Pumpkin!
ReplyDeleteI can commiserate on the potty front. The little guy is super proud when he has a day without an accident, and he's making big progress on number 1. Number 2, I'm seriously ready to bribe him("Don't forget the poop present Mommy has for you!") if it would only work. And our bathroom is similarly decorated with washed-out clothing. Ugh. And no, to the millionth person who has suggested I just learn his "schedule" for that -- he has none, and never has.
ReplyDeleteSo, much sympathy.
@hush - we had the same situation this summer. We had success transitioning first to just underpants, and keeping a portable potty in whatever room we happened to be in. There were plenty of accidents at first, and we're still in the throes of potty training as you know, so take my advice with a big grain of salt.
My girl also needs to be tired enough to go to sleep... but not TOO tired cause then we deal with the overtired craziness which just extends the bedtime routine/misery.
ReplyDeleteI've actually been impressed with myself for figuring out good timing for her bedtime depends mostly on if she napped (god help us when she does!) and when she woke up in the morning. So lights out is at/close to 8:00. On a normal, non-napping, woke up around 7:00 day, she falls asleep within 10 minutes (HURRAY!). If she slept late that morning (I have had to wake her just before 8 a couple times) or if she napped at all, I simply add the amount of time slept past 7 or amount of time napped to how long it will take her to fall asleep. It's been almost an exact one-for-one for the past few months.
Knowing these things is way better than not knowing. I can't control it either way. But I can set my own expectations, which goes a long way.
Anyway, good luck with the routines, and loosening of routines, and the potty training.
Oh the potty fight. Why do they resist it so hard? Is it because they've just acquired reasonable control over the rest of their bodies and assume that bladder control is something they can develop? That someday they will be able to go pee only when they want to and not just because they have to?
ReplyDeleteWe've instituted a "morning pee" ritual - we both go to the bathroom together very first thing. For some reason that is working fairly well.
@Parisienne Mais Presque - Merci Beaucoup for that! Let's keep our fingers crossed!
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